


Beautiful Trauma

by headofmarimo



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Although this might end up being cheesy instead, Angst, Because I'm in the mood to suffer, Blood, Character Death, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 15:18:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14167758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/headofmarimo/pseuds/headofmarimo
Summary: Because nothing is worse than losing your feelings for the people you care about.Right?Ryuji gets afflicted with the hanahaki disease.





	Beautiful Trauma

**Author's Note:**

> (I was in the mood for something angsty ;u;  
> For those who don't know, the hanahaki disease is a fictitious disease in which the victim coughs up flowers that have taken root in their respiratory system. It happens if the person is suffering from unrequited love, and in order to cure themselves they either need surgery to remove the flowers or confess their love and have it returned. If not, they will eventually die from asphyxiation, choking on their own blood, or blood loss. There are different concepts on what happens after the surgery, but for this story, getting surgery causes the patient to lose all emotions relating to love for the rest of their life.  
> Hope you enjoy reading!)

“You should’ve told me!”

A hand clasped desperately around another soaked in blood, as if clinging on tightly enough would prevent any more life from pouring out of the barely pulsing veins. “Damn it, why the hell didn’t you tell me… Ryuji?!”

Ryuji’s eyes were dull, a heavy wheeze brushing past his lips as blood bubbled out with each breath.

“W-wait, no, I’m sorry. Don’t try to talk, here…” He gently cradled Ryuji’s head in his arms, trying to lift him up into his lap, and Ryuji’s eyes seemed to regain some focus when he titled his head towards him. “Ryuji…?”

“Aki…ra…” rasped Ryuji. A wet cough, followed by more white petals tinted red with blood.

“Ryuji, I’m serious,” said Akira, his voice so tight that the words almost came out as a whimper. “You need to save your energy.”

“I’m, sorry…” murmured Ryuji, and there’s more blood dribbling out from his mouth and nose and there’s just _so much blood everywhere_ , staining the porcelain tiles of the bathroom floor with its dark color while white petals floated aimlessly about on its surface. “I didn’t want you to worry, but…”

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s gonna be okay, you’ll get through this,” pleaded Akira. “ Come on, the Leblanc bathroom is _not_ where you want to die.”

Ryuji gave a weak chuckle at that, eyes slowly fluttering shut.

He knew Ryuji had been off lately, but Ryuji simply dismissed his concerns every time he brought it up. The frequent trips to the bathroom, the heaving coughs that would cause Akira to wince every time he heard them, but each time Ryuji simply flashed that cheerful smile of his to try to allay his worries.

How could he have been so stupid?

And then the tipping point had finally been when today, after Leblanc had closed and Morgana was prowling around on the streets. Ryuji suddenly stood up after they finished a stage on the video game they were working through together and stated that he needed to use the bathroom. After twenty minutes, he still hadn’t returned, so Akira went downstairs to check on him only to find him collapsed on the floor with the door askew, soaked in a pool of his own blood with white flower petals strewn about.

Stupid! Why hadn’t he noticed earlier? If he had just been a little more persistent, if he had only tried to reach out to him more… Ryuji was badly hurt, and it was all his fault.

He noticed the clumps of petals littering the basin of the sink and the floor, so he knew what the cause was, he just needed to call an ambulance and they could get Ryuji to the hospital.

“Ryuji, I’m going to call an ambulance, okay?” He reached for his cellphone, but blunt nails digging into his wrist prevented him from moving any further.

“No…” breathed Ryuji, the words barely coming out above a whisper.

Akira could feel a rush of hot anger pricking at his chest. “Stop messing around, Ryuji! This is serious, you're actually dying!” He tried to take his cellphone out, but Ryuji tightened his grip, latching on with all of his remaining strength. “Damn it, why are you stopping me?! I know what the surgery is like, but that doesn’t mean dying is a better option! Please, Ryuji...”

“Akira…” rasped Ryuji. The look in his eyes was fierce, and Akira gave a helpless sob as he put his cellphone back in his pocket because he knew:

Ryuji would rather die than lose his emotions.

“W-well, maybe we can find who it is instead! It’s worth a shot. If she returns your feelings, then you won’t even have to go to the hospital!” said Akira desperately. “So who is it?"

Ryuji stared at him for a moment, completely silent. “Some girl in my homeroom… don’t even know her name…”

Then there was no way he could find her in time.

“Damn it…” Akira wanted to scream. “Damn it!” he pounded a fist on the floor, blood splashing across his trousers and ruddy petals swirling along the ripples.

“Akira…” repeated Ryuji. A weak smile, barely lifting the corners of his mouth. “Thank you…”

“Why… are you thanking me?” asked Akira. “I couldn’t… I couldn’t even do anything to help… I’m such a useless friend, I’m so sorry Ryuji…” there were tears dripping onto Ryuji’s face, and a hand lifted upward, cool against his heated skin as it cupped his cheek and gently brushed away the tears.

“Hey... stop it, you’re embarrassing me…” teased Ryuji. His eyes were growing dimmer. “It’s just…for giving me a place where I could belong,” murmured Ryuji. He gave a small sigh, and the smile still lingered after his hand fell limp onto Akira’s lap and his breathing came to a slow standstill.

Akira remained there for a very long time.

He didn’t know why, but the first phone call he made wasn’t for an ambulance, but for Ann. Ryuji was still lying on his lap as he told her what happened, his voice dull and quiet. He could hear the strain in Ann’s voice on the other end of the line, all of the hurt and anger laced in her tone. “Akira Kurusu, you are such an _idiot_. Both of you… the two of you are such dumbasses!” sobbed Ann.

“Huh?” before he could inquire any further about it, Ann had already hung up, the monotone ringing of the dead line buzzing in his ear.

He was too afraid to acknowledge it, but deep down, with a growing realization finally taking root after it had been too late, he knew what Ann’s words actually meant.

He dialed the phone again and made a call for an ambulance.

**Author's Note:**

> (Thanks for reading!)


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